Jurassic Park

There are two kinds of people in this world: people who love theme parks, and people dedicated to the military industrial complex. That's read a book? 

Nah, just kidding! Let's read Cracked articles about Jurassic Park! Want to reminisce about how awesome the old Sam Neill taking some pigs on a Spa Day. And while this hypothesis hasn't been confirmed by the scientific method, we've heard rumors that reading all of these articles back-to-back will make a shirtless Jeff Goldblum appear in your living room. Again, just a hypothesis. Test it out and see if life, uh, finds a way.